Hello Sweetie
by lilsherlockian1975
Summary: It would have been a relaxing afternoon for Mary and Molly had it not have been for the couple of dozen text messages the giggling pathologist received from a certain consulting detective. Mary's not having it. Investigation is required. *one shot*


_**Here is a little one shot that happened because of my own text alert and because of how much it annoys my sister... (FYI, I have no intention of changing it now that I know how much she hate's it. It's like she doesn't even know me. Evil laughter.)**_

 _ **Thanks so much to MizJoley for her supernatural betaing abilities and to MrsMCrieff for answering my Brit questions.**_

 _ **I own nothing. Enjoy!**_

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 _Hello Sweetie_... once again came from the general vicinity of Molly Hooper, followed by a fit of giggles. Mary Watson had just about had it. It was her first Ella-free day in two weeks and she wasn't exactly enjoying watching her friend frantically text while she, herself drank tea and let her curiosity get the best of her.

"Molly love. You do know it's rude to text while you're supposed to be spending time with your best girlfriend, don't you?"

Molly finally pulled her eyes away from her phone. "I'm sorry Mary, I- let me just finish this text then I'm all yours." Molly's thumbs worked double time, then she slid her mobile between her thigh and the arm of the chair. She smiled brightly then started to speak only to be interrupted, _Hello Sweetie_... "Sorry, let me just check..." She grabbed the phone.

Mary narrowed her eyes and watched the pathologist as she giggled and replied to the most recent message. "Molly, who keeps texting you?" she asked. "Is it your new fellow, Chaz?"

Molly cut her eyes up, glancing at Mary then back to her mobile. "Um, no."

"Oh, well then who is it?" Mary asked knowing perfectly well who it was. She simply couldn't help herself.

Molly started to answer but once again was interrupted by the same text alert. She smiled a bit awkwardly, but ignored it this time. "It's Sherlock."

"Ah, yes of course..." She was going to continue but just then there was an innocuous ding from Molly's phone. Mary raised an eyebrow. Molly gave her a questioning look and Mary nodded at the phone.

Molly picked it up, read the new text then put it back down without replying.

 _Interesting,_ Mary thought. "And who was that?"

"Oh, it was just Chaz," Molly said as she picked up her lukewarm tea and sipped it making a face.

They sat in silence for about a minute when another _Hello Sweetie_ came from Molly's lap. She tried to resist picking it up, Mary could see the consternation on her face.

"Are you going to tell me about the text alert Molly?" Mary asked.

"What do you mean?"

"Hello Sweetie," Mary said perfectly mimicking Alex Kingston's character on Doctor Who.

Molly suddenly looked relieved. "Oh, it's from Doctor Who, see River Song..."

"Molly, I'm British. I'd be deported if I didn't know River Song's tag line. Why is it that Sherlock's text alert is a sexy 'Hello Sweetie' and your new beau's is a boring ding?"

"Well, I changed Sherlock's so I'd know when I received a text from him," she hurried on. "Just in case it was something important like a body he needed me to autopsy or a report or something like that. You know I go on cases with him Mary. You know how demanding he can be, it helps me respond quicker. It's no big deal." She looked away uncomfortably.

"And why Hello Sweetie specifically?"

"I'm a fan?"

Mary just looked at Molly with narrowed eyes as another _Hello Sweetie_ came from Molly's phone. "Oh just reply to the man. He's not going to stop."

Molly grabbed her phone and read her messages, trying to contain her giggles (though Mary saw right through it.) She was far from finished with her interrogation, however she allowed Molly to send Sherlock a message before she started up again.

"Seventeen."

"I'm sorry?" Molly asked.

"He's sent you seventeen messages. You know Molly, you don't seem like the kind of girl to have two boyfriends at once." Mary smirked and awaited the fallout.

"Wh- wha- what are you t-talking about?" Molly stammered, turning a bright shade of pink.

 _Oh, this is getting good._ "Molly, people don't generally giggle that much about science experiments or autopsy reports. What on earth are you and Sherlock talking about?"

 _Hello Sweetie._..

Molly looked down at her mobile but refused to read the text. "Just an experiment, it's perfectly innocent."

"Sure it is," Mary said as she got up to refresh her tea. Molly followed as her phone sounded with yet another text from Sherlock.

"Mary, what you are saying is..." she huffed. "You don't understand."

Mary switched the kettle back on then turned to look at Molly. "Listen to me when I say this, I do actually understand. You and Sherlock are," She closed her eyes and shook her head. "Well you're an odd pair."

Molly looked affronted. "Excuse me?"

"Not in a bad way love. But what I _don't_ understand is why are you wasting your time with these other blokes when you have a perfectly- hold on... let me rephrase that. When you have a well suited man in your life already."

"Mary." Molly looked at the floor and gathered herself. "I keep forgetting that you haven't been around for everything. I've... I've tried. Sherlock isn't interested in me like that." They both glanced into the sitting room as Molly's text alert sounded again. "We're better as friends. This," She paused and thought for a moment. "works for us. I actually like what we have. He won't ever see me as an actual woman." At the end she looked quite sad.

Mary was starting to feel bad for her friend, although she was still convinced that she was right. "Are you absolutely certain about that?"

 _Hello Sweetie_... then a few seconds later another ding...

"Yes Mary, I am. Do me a favor, ask John about _that_ Christmas." She stormed into the sitting room and picked up her phone, then scrolled through her messages. Mary couldn't miss the smile on her face. She didn't know if it was the message from Chaz or Sherlock that had caused it, although if she were a betting woman...

As if to make a point, Molly didn't send a reply to either. She just put the phone down and stood with her arms crossed. Mary came back in and stood in front of her friend.

"Molly, may I see your mobile please?"

"Why?"

Mary just smiled warmly as Molly picked up her phone and handed it to the woman. Mary opened up Molly's text messages from Sherlock and read through them. She couldn't believe her eyes. _How on earth is she not getting this? He's not even trying to be subtle_ , Mary thought. She handed the phone back. Just as another text came in.

Mary folded her arms across her chest. "How does Sherlock feel about Chaz, Molly?"

"He um, hasn't said much. Just that Chaz is um, beneath me. And I could do much better." She picked at her jumper. "But he did say that at least this one isn't a criminal... this time, just dull and moronic."

"How many dates has he interrupted or made you miss completely?"

Molly looked up at the ceiling. "Maybe two or three?"

"Fibbing Molly!"

She sighed. "Six."

"Six? You've only been dating for three weeks," Mary exclaimed with a smile growing on her face. "How is it that you don't see what's going on? And a better question, why is Chaz putting up with this?"

 _Hello Sweetie_...

Molly looked at the phone in her hand. "No, no. You're wrong. He..." she trailed off.

Mary grabbed Molly's shoulders. "Think about it."

Suddenly _Secret Agent Man_ started playing from Mary's phone, she picked it up. "Hullo Sherlock," Pause. "Yes, she's here-she's fine," Pause. "We were busy. I was teaching her how to use a glock," She winked at Molly. "Fine we were braiding each other's hair," Pause. "She is allowed some time to herself you know." Pause. "Okay, stop yelling ya big baby. Here, he wants to talk to you," She handed Molly her mobile.

"Hi Sherlock," Molly said in a soft voice, there was a pause. "She was obviously kidding about the gun Sherlock." Molly rolled her eyes as she listened to him. "No, well I- I was going to have dinner with Chaz tonight. I can't very well cancel again without..." She looked at Mary who was biting her lip and giving Molly an encouraging look. "Um, but I suppose I could if... D-do you want me to cancel my plans Sherlock?" Molly listened. Mary was in agony wondering what the consulting man-child was saying. Molly's face betrayed nothing. Finally Molly sighed and looked slightly disappointed. "Yeah sure, I can pick up some toes on my way over," she said sounding completely defeated. There was another long pause. Suddenly her face lit up. "Well, yes I-I would much rather have dinner. We could do the experiment later if..." Pause. "Oh," Pause, Molly blushed and turned away from Mary. "Sherlock, I can't believe you just said that." Pause. "Yes, I mean..." Pause. "Oh my God Sherlock." Molly broke into a fit of giggles. "Okay, okay. Save it for later. I'll be there in an hour. Bye," She rang off and handed Mary back her phone.

Mary couldn't help but smile broadly at her friend. "Well, I take it I was right."

Molly was still an alarming shade of red as she gathered her phone and bag. "Ah, it seems that yes, you may have been correct in your..."

"Oh for shit's sake Molly! What the hell did he say to you?"

"He said that since his subtle texts weren't working he'd rather put his hands to better use." Molly paused and smoothed down some imaginary fly-aways in her hair. "Then he started explaining how he was going to do that. Now if you'll excuse me, I have to break up with Chas and get to 221B as fast as I possibly can." Molly turned and started to walk away when Sherlock's text alert sounded again. Molly pulled her mobile out to read the message. "Jesus, Sherlock. Impatient much!" She turned to Mary. "I can't believe he put that in a text message. Who knew Sherlock Holmes had such a dirty mind," she said as sprinted out the door.

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 _ **Thanks for reading! Don't forget to review/comment. I love hearing from you all!**_


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